so i came back from the dance just now....it was great. justin was pretty bummed and he didnt wanna go to the dance. but i knew it was just what he needed. so i tricked him to going. i was like doode...senas going to the dance! i wanna go now! haha will u go with me? he was like...fine. HAHA we hung out with michael wu like right after school and he wasnt too happy or energetic. but he went. i went for two reasons...for justin and for sena. i went to the dance and i didnt freak at all. i didnt even dance at all. not even slow dance. but its okay..i got in for free anyways. HAHA so its all good. im sad i didnt get to dance with sena though...i just wanted one dance...but i jsut couldnt ask her. shes a really sweet girl...and shes really great. but man...she can get any guy she wants. i know im last on her list. so i gotta move on you know? like if you like someone...then you dont tell them you like them...u show them right? i have been showing that....but i guess it gets lost in translation. im okay though. my heart hurts...but i feel really happy for some reason. man i hate that feeling when you jsut really like someone and they just dont like you back and they do not even acknoledge you are there. its the worst. HAHAHA i have finally moved on from kimmy. but doode....girls just dont like me....HAHAHAHAHAHa it makes me laugh cuz im surprised i care so much. idk i never cared much about girls anyways. im more of the type of guy who wants to be a gentle man and treat the girl right. but now a days....it about whether or not youre good in bed or if you drink and do all this stuff that i jsut cant stand. man. ppl can be better. theres temptaion and bad things out there to show us that we can be better people. we can always make a good decision. i cant stand it....theres so much good in people...why do i feel like im the only who sees that!? its driving me nuts. why do we gotta judge ppl? man. i wish i could just help everyone. but ppl dont wanna listen to a guy like me.one day...i want to become an important man. an important person with power. i wanna help everyone. im sick and tired of this. we can all be better. God made us better then this. we choose to be like this. but we can be better......we have every right to be better then sttling for the least. youre given free will not to do what ever you want but so you can choose to make the right choice....
but man..i think about sena soo much. it sucks....idk. i think i need to move on. shes out of my league. im a nobody. God says if you want to be first, then you must first be last. here i am...last. and im okay with it. will i ever be first? HHA I love God...i love my family. thats all i got an thats all i need.
No comments:
Post a Comment