My fisrst blog

Hey Mr. Blog. Nice to meet you. Uhhmm, idk what to type. But i guess this is a good start. haha

Well, i heard that blogs are just like journals so i will treat you Mr.Blog like my journal.

Well here it goes...Today I was pretty busy. I woke up and went on aim and fb to see if anyone is on. No one was on though so i decided to watch TV but i couldn't. I was too busy thinking about a girl. Not just any ordinary girl though. She's a special girl and thinking about her made me wanna be productive and be helpful. I ended up taking a shower my lil bro cuz he smelled really bad and he forgot to wipe his butt the previous night after going to the restroom. But its all good. He is squeaky clean now. I have never done this before....it feels awkward but cool at the same time. While I'm writing i keep thinking if anyone is gonna read this. Are you reading this right now? If you are than you should stop!

Well I guess you kept reading cuz then you wouldnt be reading this. But you are! So then keep reading. But if you keep reading i already consider you a stalker so its not too late to stop! haha well after i took a shower my lil bro i went on fb to talk to my friends. they came over at like one today and we worked on some stuff for skool. We got some stuff done but it wasn't as productive as i hoped it to be. How much am i supposed to write? I will keep writing i guess...im gonna speak my heart not my mind.

I hope I can be a great person one day. I feel so evil sometimes and i dont think its a good thing. The other day i didnt do the laundry and i wanted to beat myself up! pretty evil huh? I know, i should be arrested. But i'm still here, at the computer, so i guess the police didnt catch me yet. It sucks though, cuz no matter how hard i try i feel so unaccomplished at the end of the day! The only time i feel satisfied is on sundays. God is so good to me....I have never been good to him. Not for even one second. I don't deserve his love....but he continues to love me. I pray sometimes that he will stop loving me so that way i would not feel the guilt of not loving him in return. But he still loves me....and he always will. And it hurts. It hurts to love. I can love him all my life but i can never love him as much as he loves me. Thats why i feel i am indebted to him. I will do anything for him....even give up the girl of my dreams for him. I would give up my family, wealth, and fame. I don't care where i am, i onle care where i will be. And thats with God. If that dream ever comes true then my life will be complete. I dont care about the splendors in heaven....the real prize is Jesus Christ. I cant describe how i feel on this blog. Its stupid to think that a computer can compute my feelings. That will never happen....not even in a million years. EVerytime I turn back from God he remains right in front of me...as if i never turned around. How does he do it? how can he be everywhere and nowhere at the same time?

I know one thing...and its this. Knowledge can only go so far and its only through the intentions of the heart that you can go far in life. I love God and this girl I met has reminded me again what it feels like to feel loved and cared for. I recieve it from my family everyday but there is such a great love from God that you need more than family to full understand the comlexity of it. Love is just to simply sacrifice. but there is so much more to it. If i try to describe it i'm afraid it would take me more than one lifetime to complete. I promised to myself that the only thing i would never love, is myself. I never wanna be a selfish man. I wanna be a great person. That can only be achieved through Jesus. I need to make my relationship with him better. I hope that as time goes by i can full realize and gain wisdom on the aspect of love. All i know now is that i met a girl. I have known her for a while now, but i feel like i just met her. She blows me away everyday as if it was the first time we met. She gave me a song today on AIM and i'm still listening to it. Its on repeat in my itunes, its replayed 32 times already. haha im obsessed with this girl and i want it to stop but at the same time i dont. I guess thats the part that really got to me. The fact that how much i like this girl is similar to the way God feels about me. I never realized it in this way but just how I cant do anything through out the day without thinking about this girl, God wont go even one second without thinking about me. God will try to not think about me but he cares about me too much. I can't get this girl out of my mind....God can't get me out of his mind and i cant get my mind away from him. The funny thing is....I think about this girl just as much as i think about God. Whenever i think about her i think about God. And Vice versa. She makes everything seem so united and full and complete. DOODE. its way too hard to describe this girl, theres just so much. i will save it for next time i guess.

Well, i guess i should probably finish this up. It got kinda long...but i hope its okay. Sorry Mr. Blog. I didnt mean to bore you. But I hope you think i'm at least an okay person. Just lovestruck i guess. i feel so confused but so peaceful at the same time. I guess thats what love is. haha well, I will talk to you later Mr. Blog. Sleep well. you too stalker, hope i didnt make you tired.

Siincerely,
Samuel Young